Joy? It’s Simpler Than You Think
I sat down and mapped out a 'joy list'... and honestly, it's embarrassingly simple.
I've been doing a bit of homework lately... mapping out, in real detail, what actually gives me joy and what quietly takes it away. Not the big, obvious stuff, the little things. The kind of stuff you'd almost forget to notice if you didn't stop and write it down!
And that's the bit I want to share with you... because I think joy gets a bad reputation. We treat it like it's frivolous. A nice-to-have. Something you find once the “real” work of life is sorted. But when I actually sat down and mapped mine out, what struck me is how small most of it is. How available it already is, just waiting for you to notice it.
Here's some of what's on my list...
The sun on my face in spring.
Watching a new bulb appear, or a flower open in my garden overnight (still feels like magic every single time).
Backgammon and chess with my husband Matt, no screens anywhere near us.
A new music track falling into place, perfectly, right in the moment.
Listening to a waterfall. Well, any water to be honest.
A long hug after a hard day. (No words needed)
Watching birds come and go on my bird feeder.
Putting your pyjamas on after they've been on the radiator.
Cycling with Matt on a warm summer evening with nowhere in particular to be.
None of that is expensive. None of it is complicated. Most of it takes just a few minutes... you've probably got time for at least one of these before you finish reading this post!
And then there's the other list. What takes joy away.
Comparison, for a start.
Scrolling and watching everyone else who seem to have it more sorted than me.
The pressure to be endlessly “on,” endlessly growing, never allowed an off day.
Letting other people's noise, their opinions, their judgement, get right under my skin.
No music, no nature, nothing but endless grey and rain and being stuck indoors.
Spending lots of time with people who don't share my values.
What I noticed, writing it all out, is that joy and freedom are basically the same feeling wearing different clothes.
Everything on my “joy” list is unrestricted, unforced, in flow.
And everything on the other list makes me smaller, more careful, more shut down.
Joy isn't really about happiness, if you ask me. It's about feeling free enough to be yourself in the ordinary moments, without performing or protecting or holding back.
Which, funnily enough, is the whole idea behind sound therapy and meditation once you strip it right back. It's not about achieving some blissed-out state! It's about creating enough safety and space that your nervous system can stop bracing... and joy has somewhere to land.
Speaking of joy landing somewhere unexpected...
This is exactly what happened at our debut Sketch & Sound evening in June. Our resident artist Michelle set the room up with a gentle intro to neurographic art, no experience needed, just paper, colour and permission. Then cellist George and I played, live, improvised, weaving violin and cello through modular synths, gong, birdsong and a looping monochord, morphing between moods that were gnarly and unnerving one minute and completely beautiful the next.
That night I felt so free playing in a way I don't think I ever have before.
Every time I looked up, people were head down, pens moving, completely lost in it. As the final note faded out, one participant said, “I don't want it to stop.” Another couldn't believe how quickly the time had gone... because they'd properly dropped out of their thinking mind and into something quieter underneath it.
That's joy too. Watching a room full of near-strangers give themselves permission to just be, for one evening, without needing to get it right. We're already planning to bring our Sunday Special Sketch & Sound event back this autumn, so keep an eye out!
In the meantime, I'd love to know... what's on your joy list? Sometimes just writing it down is enough to remember it's there.
Listen: A 3-Minute Gratitude Meditation
If you'd like a little practice in noticing your own joy list, this one's for you.
It's a short gratitude meditation, three minutes, gently guiding you to see what's already here... the big things and the small things, the people, the places, the everyday moments that make a difference.
No experience needed, just press play.
This is exactly what sound therapy and guided meditation are here for, whether that's a private Sonic Spa Experience, a group sound bath in Glossop or Whaley Bridge, or three minutes with a recording on your own sofa.
Nervous system regulation doesn't need to be complicated. It just needs a bit of space.
So here's your homework, if you want it: write your own joy list.
Notice what's already working.
And if you fancy trying it out loud with me, you know where to find me... at a sound bath, a Sonic Spa Experience, or right here with a recording and three spare minutes.
