Feeling Sound vs Thinking Sound
The story behind my name - and why it’s a reminder for me to feel sound too.
When did you last stop what you were doing to truly listen to what’s happening around you?
Are you living a life full of noise, or music?
In this busy world it’s rare that we listen, not just hear. To ourselves, and to the impact the sound around us has. And when things feel off, many of us try to intellectualise and think our way out of discomfort.
I’m guilty of this too.
But I caught myself recently.
I’d spent a few weeks thinking my way through a tricky patch - plotting, reading, studying, learning. Truth be told it’s been a tough slog. Filled with doubt and questioning.
And then - in aisle 3 of B&M, buying treats to soothe myself - a song I hadn’t heard for years stopped me in my tracks.
It reminded me of when I was 13 and my nan died.
(The song was The Verve’s The Drugs Don’t Work, in case you’re wondering. It was number 1 when she died.)
Using music as a tool to process change
I thought back to that time in my life. Growing up in an Irish family, we didn’t talk about feelings. It was more of a case of - that’s life, just get on with it.
At 13, I had no idea how to process the sadness and grief I felt. I didn’t even really have the vocabulary for what I was feeling. Years later, rereading my diaries, I could see it written between the lines - all that unnamed emotion with nowhere to go.
The adults around me were struggling too. My nan was a fundamental part of our world. Sunday dinners, weekly card games, encouraging me to play my violin and piano over and over, the yearly cards to tell me well done for a good school report. She was the glue of our unit.
And then she passed so quickly, I didn’t have chance to say goodbye. I carried guilt over that for years.
In 1997, my only outlet was music. The relief I got from playing my instruments, listening to sad songs on my Walkman, searching for lyrics that somehow gave voice to these strange uncomfortable feelings.
There wasn’t talk of counselling or therapy. There was no safe space to express feelings, to be heard or understood. There was no collective sharing of grief.
It wasn’t anyone’s fault that none of us - my parents included - had any idea what to do with that sadness.
How music can support us through life’s challenges
It’s only now, with years of personal therapy, qualifications and continued professional training, that I finally understand the tools and techniques available.
I see it as Feeling Sound’s mission to help people process the feelings that words can’t find. My events as a way for us to come back to feeling more like ourselves.
The instruments I work with each carry something different.
Himalayan singing bowls are a powerful tool for soothing grief and bereavement.
Crystal bowls calm a busy, anxious, noisy and stressed mind.
Gong baths release physical pain and tension, aiding better sleep and respite from chronic pain and fatigue.
Soundscapes and binaural beats help with focus and flow - better concentration at work, or soothing symptoms of neurodiverse conditions like ADHD and autism.
A moment to pause
Hearing that song in B&M brought me back to feeling, not thinking.
It gave me an opportunity to stop. To notice the tightness in my chest, the inevitable release of tears (which I’ve now learnt is a good thing, not a weakness), the tension in my jaw.
I stopped plotting, doing, hatching, writing, reading, studying - and had the rest of the day just to be. To feel. Ugly, sad, a bit rubbish.
My only medicine for that day was music.
And gosh did I need that prescription.
Using sound to feel through the tricky stuff
Using sound or music as a way to feel through difficult emotions is such a simple technique. And it doesn’t have to be grand or formal.
It can be small things - like noticing a bird singing when you feel alone. Connection is the opposite of isolation.
It can be humming to the same tone as the coffee machine or microwave - like chanting, a fun way to reenergise and regulate your nervous system.
It can be turning the speakers up to 11 when the neighbours have finally gone out and having a mosh in the living room. Movement helps us physically move through emotions too.
It can even be singing nursery rhymes to your hamster. Laughter and playfulness boost serotonin and dopamine to help us feel more positive.
What are the sounds or songs that help you feel - not think - your way through tricky emotions?
The name Feeling Sound isn’t an accident. It’s a reminder - to me as much as anyone - that the point isn’t to analyse or understand sound from a distance. It’s to let it in. To feel it.
Sometimes that happens in a session, lying on a mat with a gong overhead.
And sometimes it happens in aisle 3 of B&M, completely unexpectedly, with tears rolling down your face.
Both count.
Written by Clare Savory - feelingsound.co
Accredited by the British Academy of Sound Therapy and the British School of Meditation.
